Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Tug-Ahoy!

I've recently discovered the TLC show Strange Sex.  It is my new guilty pleasure.  A man that uses his thumb as a surrogate penis, a married couple with no teeth that are swingers, balloon fetishes, and a woman with two vaginas!  This is like circus freak stuff.  And how could you not love a circus freak?!  However, what I found most fascinating was the man who was TO'd that his greedy mother had stolen his 24k gold plated foreskin.  And his biggest complaint seemed to be that he lasted too long in bed.  Oh his poor wife...tear.  So he decided to be all MacGuyver and build a foreskin-making machine.  I hope we are on the same page here and you are also having a mental image of a cross between an easy-bake oven and the cabbage patch doll whos hair would grow when you pulled on it.  He called his invention The Tugger.  Somebody hand this man a f-ing Nobel Prize.  Like yesterday.  I'm not sure that the end result was a new foreskin, however it did manage to turn his penis inside out.  It looked like it was wearing a stylish turtle-neck.  Wait...turtle-necks are not stylish.  So neither was his penis.  Then this man went all entrepreneur like Oprah and the Donald and got his whole family to mass market these pork tuggies.  It must have been such a bonding experience for him and his pre-teen daughters. Oh and his wife's post-tuggie analysis-it was soft and squishy.  Uh huh...

So this new age Albert Einstein got me thinking about the foreskin battle.  Seeing as it is getting less and less common to be circumsized, it makes me curious what the current baby-making generation think about this debate.


And in case you or someone you know can't stand one more day with his mushroom friend, you can always consider ordering The Tugger. Move over pillow pet, you're getting sent to the clearance bin with the snuggie.  Your endcap must be cleared because Bed Bath and Beyond will for sure order a gaggle of these.

6 comments:

Lady Delilah said...

I just discoverd this show too and I am OBSESSED!

morganX said...

It's soo addicting! I was surprised a show like that was on TLC!

Jess said...

I totally need to watch this show.
Oh, and: our son isn't circumcised. :) At the hospital where he was born, it is about 60-40. 60% of baby boys are circumcised, 40% aren't.

Emily said...

I definitely watched that episode a few weeks back. Crazy! I am part of a mommy forum from back when I first got pregnant last year. The circumcision debate was huge! I was surprised, I really thought it was just more common than not to circumcise. That said, I'm so glad I had a girl and didn't have to worry about it.

And all that said, you've got yourself one new follower! You're funny, and I need more funny in my life!

Jenn said...

Hi, I'm the latest following guru.
The fact that you've mentioned 24K gold foreskin and pork tuggies in the same post sold me. I am easily amused and can't help myself.
Fucking brilliant.

Jenn

We Four Explorers said...

I'm with Jenn (above)! You had me at foreskin and The Tugger! I NEED to check out this show (if I can steal the remote from the two males in my family...one of which should be asleep if I'm gonna watch said show).
I'm following you. Thanks so much for commenting on my blog!
Janet @ http://wefourexplorers.blogspot.com/

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